Share Your Story

Living life on life’s terms is hard. It is hard to accept some of the things that happen to us. We want to rush through life or have an answer for everything. For what? The end result is the same for all of us. But what we endure along the way, makes us each so different.

Whether we eat healthy, work out and do all of the “right” things…there is no telling what will happen next. Life is so odd that way.

This is why I am so interested in everyone’s “story”. We all have one. Good or bad, I find each person so unique given the story behind them.

Life gives each of us a personal book. Full of twists and turns, humor and dark chapters. Some more than others. Honestly, sometimes I kick myself for not asking my mom to write more about her life because boy, was she a wild one.

I am not someone you would pin as “loud and outgoing”. No, I am more of the “read your emotions” kind. Or, a people watcher. Watcher of all the people, if ya will. (Haha)

I can sit in a mall and give each person a back story just solely based on their actions I see. Yes, I know I am probably never right. But isn’t it fun to guess? I think we all hit a point in life where we just wonder what the heck we are here for. What is the point in all of this? But I suppose that is the beauty of living life on “life’s terms“. We never know what is happening next for us really. I guess this is why I chose to start sharing my story. A story in which almost ended way too early. Maybe one day my children will read the things I have wrote and understand mom was just as human and full of emotion just as anyone else. We are all in this crazy roller coaster ride of life together and sometimes we just need to feel like our story is worth being told. Yes, we are all human and share the same emotions. But I am interested in what made you the way you are. The things that make you, YOU.

So, tell me a part of your story you are proud of . Heck, even something you may not be proud of, but it made you who you are.

Because our stories are meant to be shared.

-Lyndsi

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Patience In Recovery

It takes many years for some. It definitely has for me.

It does not happen over night.

Recovery goes at its own pace and is different for everyone.

Recovery isn’t about just sobering up. No, recovery means healing the parts of you, YOU have tried to drown for so long.

I do not believe there is ever an end to “becoming better”. If we truly want better, we must work every day to make sure those unhealed parts of us are brought to the surface and faced head on.

It is painful.

Some of it is ugly.

Very ugly.

I have kicked some a** on not wanting to drink or use for a better me. But healing the parts of myself that brought me there are still a daily struggle.

I’m impatient. Very, very impatient. I like quick fixes for everything.

I always find something wrong with with myself that can be worked on. But, there is no magic pill for personal growth.

I stopped fighting the demons from my past and welcomed the worry of the future head on. This has taken a toll on my mental clarity.

Patience is something I have always struggled with. But don’t we all?

We all want happiness…but we want it NOW.

The thought of the hard work we have to do to get there gets so overwhelming we put it off. BUT GUESS WHAT? The years still pass.

Nothing slows down for us.

Time waits for no-one.

What if we had been working on our happiness and goals that entire time? Instead of all the “quick fixes”. Where would we be down the road? Yes, always live in the moment, but never let go of why you want to become better.

I live life between living to be present and constantly overwhelming myself with plans of the future.

Finding a meeting point between knowing you have done all you can for the day and wishing we had done more is something we all long for. What a sense of peace.

The process of becoming a better version of yourself can be overwhelming…who am I kidding? It is overwhelming. But, the exact moment you can look back and say “damn, I have come a long way from who I once was” is a part of that peace we long for.

A sense of pride knowing YOU ARE capable of anything YOU set your mind to is so empowering. Happiness is a journey and I have only started paving my pathway.

So, today I choose to be patient with myself, and know I have done my absolute best for a better tomorrow.

-Lyndsi

Always “More”

The funny thing about addiction is..you really don’t fully comprehend how bad it is until you truly want better.

I tried for what seemed like forever to become “fully” sober. But as I became less and less indulged in active addiction I found myself grasping for anything that would just take the edge off a smidge.

In and out of smoke shops trying new “legal” substances that would take me somewhere I had no business being anymore; high.

Taking a pill here and there to just “calm my nerves” knowing damn good and well my body and addiction never would allow “just one.”

I had to fully give up the life I lived for so long to truly live a life I want to stay sober in.

Recovery wasn’t as fast as it looked to outsiders. I battled my demons alone as I always have.

But this time I came out on top.

I was finally able to stop grasping for something more and hold on to what I had.

-Lyndsi

Here Come the Holiday BLAHS!

The holidays are upon us folks and as usual this mother camper is not even the least bit ready!

Despite living in a camper for years now, I have never actually decorated or put a tree up in our tiny space. The thought of making this small space even more crowded just gives me anxiety. We usually spend our holidays with my in-laws and I have been perfectly content with it until now.

We have always made it a point to travel back to my husbands parents to spend our Christmas, this year may be different. We are over a thousand miles away from his parents home and have NO desire to make that drive this year. Both of my parents have passed so changing it up and taking the family to one of my parents just is not in the cards anymore.

We own a 38 ft fifth wheel we have renovated to fit our specific family needs, and although its new to us, shes still an older camper and space is super limited. I am constantly purging items (mostly kids junk) turning my table every which way and trying to keep the place clean to give my home on wheels a spacious feel.

This year has been tough for all of us, 2020 has not been nice to anyone but, here we are entering the final months so we ought to make the best of it RIGHT?!

I wouldn’t totally say I am a going to go full blown Christmas throw up on every inch of my camper but, I think my little family deserve a cheerful holiday season and DAMN IT, I deserve it too!! This is our home, this is where we share our most personal and intimate times of our lives, this is where I want to share our Christmas joys as well!

WE ARE ALL WE GOT!!

Your little family is the most important item on your Christmas list every year so make sure you make it WORTH IT!

Lets make the end of 2020 not only memorable for the chaotic wild roller coaster of hell its been but, make it worth looking back and enjoying how we made the best of it!

So, put a tree up mama! Whether its a car tree air freshener hung up on the wall by a tack or a Charlie Browns Christmas tree on a table in the corner, just bring some joy to your tiny space! Hell, we all deserve it.

Christmas 2020, all I’m asking is you come in easy, treat us well, and let us take one happy joyful moment of this year with us into 2021.

-FullTimeMother-Camper

Top Three Personal Growth MUSTS for Better Mental Health

See, I’ve had a very “blah” last couple of days. I get this way often. But something was so different about the last three weeks that my mind had suddenly felt a little calmer..maybe even a peaceful place to be for now.

Today though, it was not one of the “good” days. My anxiety and negative thoughts got the best of me. I didn’t want to continue this writing or trying my hand at this blog thing at all. I told myself I was a failure and I’m not good at anything.

Today I don’t have a wild RV adventure to share with you. I spent my day pulling myself out of my funk by reminding myself how far I have come and why. So I decided to share what I wrote down in my notes folder in my phone that has helped me grow as a stronger person, mother and wife. Like I said it’s been one Hell of a ride.

  • Keep your personal and relationship issues to yourself. Unless you’re having a heart to heart with your best friend..never allow someone else to gossip about your hardships. When people have nothing better to do, they tend to gossip about your screw ups and mishaps. Don’t let it happen. Even when you’re doing well..keep pushing and celebrate with those who know you best. I’m a definite over sharer and this has probably been one of the most important things I’ve had to learn!
  • Save YOURSELF. Being alone with yourself and thoughts for a long period of time..you get tired of your own damn self. There is no one else in the world that is going to make things better for you BUT YOU!!! You have to make the better choices for yourself and find out who you really are and everything that is not you..you have to let go! This has been 100% the most important for me. Over the course of this pandemic I have learned to be alone and heal MYSELF on my own. Although it’s been a tough lonely road..I can finally say I do NOT feel guilty for the choices I make for myself NOW more now than I ever have..and I haven’t felt that way in a very LONG time.
  • Love those who love you and be present. This has taken me more time than to understand..I have commitment issues and still do. Not only with relationships but with future commitments and goals as well. Somehow I always make up scenarios in my mind as to why things that are seemingly going well..will never work out. Im working on be more present and enjoying what I have in front of me. (I do this thing really well where I just self sabotage everything!😩) This life is short..we don’t get a do-over!!! Take care of yourself for fuck sakes and enjoy the little things that are happening today because tomorrow just isn’t promised.

I’m not sure how many people will actually get to see this post, but if I can dig myself out of a dark hell anyone can!

As I sat in the park today with my kiddos enjoying the Mountain View’s I had to remind myself how very lucky I am to be their mother and I HAVE to be present for them.

Reading something positive each has really helped me in my personal growth. No, I am not just saying that…it truly has helped me become better and stay on the right path. I actually came across a book on amazon for a “Year of Positive Thinking” and thought it might be perfect for anyone who might need that extra push each day!

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No “Normal”

For the full time camper travelling mom who has a mental breakdown at least three times a week…it’s going to be okay. Just breath and know you are doing your best.

But, lets be real.

Sometimes its not.

This lifestyle is not for the faint of heart, especially for us Empaths and very emotional mommas with one or more kids. Let’s not forget to mention the HUGE black cloud of “what if’s” from Covid and the constant worry of what is going to happen next?!

It is always the same battles we’re fighting each time we move to a new RV park.

  • Are we always going to home school or should we switch from school to school?
  • Wanting a real home for our kids with their own personal room space.
  • A “normal” life. (Trust me, there is no such thing.)
  • Is this way of life even right for my children?

Trust me, I have thought about the last one more than ANYTHING.

Despite all of the “what ifs” and heavy anxiety decisions here we are! Still trekking and travelling on. And do you know what the beauty of it is? We have experienced A LOT of “firsts” together as a family. The amount of breathtaking views and countless adventures we have been on together outweigh ANY anxiety I have had about my decision any day.

Making the decision to go full time on the road with my family has never come easy for me. (Surprise, surprise!) It has had its fair share of ups and downs. HEAVY on the downs. (That is a whole story in its own!)

I have never been one to share my feelings or allow anyone to shame the way I raise my children, but I want other mothers in a similar situation to know there ARE more of us!